Chapter 89: East Sea Rumors
Lu Qingyang was squatting in a corner of the black market, munching on a crab roe pastry, when the fake Jade Slip hanging from his waist, emblazoned with 'Chief Alchemist of Tianji Pavilion,' began to sizzle.
He casually grabbed a handful of mud and smeared it on the Jade Slip, then unfurled a tattered cloth inscribed with 'Ancestral Undergoing Tribulation Pills,' and shouted to a passing Cultivator, "Look, look! Nine-turn pills personally refined by a Soul Transformation Stage mighty expert... Ouch!"
Before he could finish, he was drenched in fish soup.
"You, Lu!" The fat Cultivator, clutching an empty bowl, trembled all over. "The tribulation-evading talisman you sold me three days ago exploded with chili powder when it met lightning fire!"
Laughter immediately erupted all around. Lu Qingyang wiped the soup from his face and suddenly pointed to the sky: "Look quickly! True Person Chijiao is streaking after a Mermaid!"
While everyone looked up, he snatched up his stall and darted into a dark alley.
When the fat Cultivator gave chase, he only saw a doggerel poem crookedly carved on the wall: "East Sea Cultivators know not the worth, mistaking chili for spiritual fire. Should you one day reach the Nascent Soul stage, I'll gift you Lightning Tribulation as your quilt."
Three quarters of an hour later, Lu Qingyang was lying with his legs crossed in the cargo hold of a ferry.
He pulled out a Storage Pouch he'd swiped from the fat Cultivator and poured out seventeen Mid-Grade Spirit Stones. "This fool actually embroidered 'Death to the greedy' at the bottom of the pouch..."
Before he finished speaking, the cabin door was split open by Sword Qi, and nine Loose Cultivator Alliance Disciples formed a sword array.
"Daoist Lu," the leader said, frost dripping from his sword tip, "True Person Chijiao invites you for tea."
"Tea sounds good!" Lu Qingyang clapped the straw mat and stood up. "Mr. Lu loves Dragon Saliva Tea the most. May I ask when Immortal Master will transform into a Dragon?"
Before he finished, his eyes suddenly widened. "Fellow Daoist, your crotch is torn!"
Everyone subconsciously looked down. Lu Qingyang flung out some itching powder, mixed with a rouge box he'd swiped from the Tianxiang Pavilion.
While everyone was sneezing incessantly, he flipped over and leaped out of the porthole, not forgetting to shout back, "Tell that old man Chijiao that his Dao Companion praised my waist strength last night!"
As the waves soaked his Daoist robe, the black lotus on his arm suddenly throbbed with intense pain.
Lu Qingyang stumbled onto a deserted island, where he ran into an old man with a white beard fishing.
The old man's fishing rod twitched slightly, and a wooden plaque reading 'Ghost Doctor Bai Yanluo' was hanging from the hook.
"The consultation fee is three thousand Spirit Stones," the old man said without turning his head.
"How much do you think this is worth, old sir?" Lu Qingyang pulled out a thunder pearl, with Chu Zhaonan's unique mark carved on its surface.
Bai Wugou's eye twitched. "The Thunder Prison Pursuit Order is priced at five thousand..."
"Deal!" Lu Qingyang stuffed the thunder pearl into the old man's arms. "Two thousand in change!"
During the treatment, silver needles pierced his Nascent Soul, making Lu Qingyang grimace in pain. "Your technique, were you a pig butcher in a past life?"
Bai Wugou sneered and increased the pressure. "This witch's curse needs the Red Maple Dew from the Blood Maple Forest in Southern Xinjiang to suppress it. You won't live past..."
"Let's talk about that in three thousand years!" Lu Qingyang suddenly rolled off the stone platform, and the 'East Sea Spiritual Plant Illustrated Guide' he had just swiped slipped from his sleeve.
As the sound of rushing air came from outside the island, he had already left large characters in the sand: "Charge this debt to True Person Chijiao!"
In the twilight, the ferry's lights were brightly lit. Lu Qingyang, disguised as a fisherman, squatted at the stern, grilling fish.
When the Penglai inspector questioned him, he held up a charred grilled fish: "I am the brother-in-law of True Person Chijiao's nephew's cousin!"
The inspector stared at the faint lightning patterns on the fish's belly and actually let him pass.
At midnight, Lu Qingyang counted his gains under the moonlight: extorted Spirit Stones, a swiped medical book, and half a bag of crab roe pastries.
The Starfall Compass in his arms suddenly played a recording of him stealing a spiritual chicken during his Golden Core Stage: "Cluck cluck! Lu Qingyang stole a chicken!"
"Damn it!" He angrily threw the compass. "Which immoral Artifact Spirit is this!"
The compass bounced up, revealing a star map of Southern Xinjiang, where the Blood Maple Forest's location resonated with the black lotus mark.
Amidst the sound of waves, he pulled out a fake 'Huangquan Duer Sutra' to pad his grilled fish, the 'Nine Nether' characters on the cover stained with oil.
A thousand miles away, in the Loose Cultivator Alliance's main hall, True Person Chijiao crushed a communication Jade Slip.
Three hundred black-scaled warships rose from the waves, their decks piled with Lu Qingyang's 'evidence': chili powder tribulation-evading talismans, talking Puppet talismans, and dud thunder pearls carved with 'Chijiao the Bastard'...
