Ichigo Kurosaki also leaned over to read, and saw the first page read:
[For some reason, I often forget the time. Xiao Ai reminded me to use some more iconic things to mark the time. So, I plan to use the cases I have handled to replace the passage of time. After all, for me, the future Sherlock Holmes, the time accumulated by the cases is far more valuable than the time that passes naturally...]
[Today is the 100th case I have handled, which is an important step towards becoming Sherlock Holmes. Damn Black Organization, if they hadn't fed me a strange drug that turned me into a child and kept tracking me down, I wouldn't have had to celebrate in secret.]
[Today is the thousandth case I have handled. It is a rare sunny day and a commemorative day. Coincidentally, Xiaolan and Uncle Maori are going on a trip, so I can go with them and celebrate...]
[Unconsciously, 10,000 cases have been solved. Am I one step closer to becoming the Sherlock Holmes of the Heisei era? ]
[The achievement of the 100,000th case has been completed, come on, Kudo Shinichi, you can do it...]
[The millionth case. Hmm, something seems to be wrong...]
[Today, there are 1,897,322 cases. I feel like I haven't seen Xiaolan, Xiaoai and the others for a long time...]
[Three million, eight hundred and sixty-seven thousand and fifty-six cases. I went to find Xiaolan and Xiaoai. They were laughing happily. Ah, no, are they laughing? Why can't I see clearly...]
[Something’s wrong. Something ...
[There are suspicious things in Xiaolan and Xiaoai's behavior, expressions, and words, but in my opinion, there seems to be nothing wrong, but there is a deep sense of disobedience. No, it seems that I haven't seen Dr. Agasa and his parents for a long time. Where are they? Kudo Shinichi, you are a detective, you should find the truth!!!]
[Mouri Kogoro turned out to be the murderer of the case. He killed his ex-wife because he hated her after being separated for many years. He was also a member of the Black Organization. Then he was killed by Gin to silence him. Everything happened right in front of my eyes... This is impossible, this shouldn't be the case, this is wrong!!!]
[Kudo Shinichi, you are a detective. You must remember that you are a detective who aspires to be Sherlock Holmes. After eliminating all impossibilities, no matter how incredible the truth is, it is the unquestionable truth...]
[And now, after reasoning, the truth that appeared before me, which is enough to answer all doubts, is only one, that is, the problem is not Xiaolan and Xiaoai, nor is it Uncle Maori and others, but... Kudo Shinichi!!!]
[Although I don't want to admit it, according to my reasoning, the existence named Kudo Shinichi has gone crazy. He is imprisoned in the body of Edogawa Conan. What he sees with his eyes are all hallucinations, what he hears are all auditory hallucinations, and everything he perceives is completely different from the reality. Maybe in the eyes of Xiaolan and Xiaoai, the existence named Edogawa Conan is a complete lunatic. Maybe it's worse than this. In their eyes, Edogawa Conan is a hateful and terrifying evil creature...]
[But fortunately, Kudo Shinichi, who is imprisoned in the body of Edogawa Conan, still has one last weapon, a weapon called reasoning, which can definitely see through all these falsehoods...]
[It’s fake, everything is fake... It’s all hallucinations, it’s all hallucinations, I must find the truth...]
[I discovered that the so-called rationality and truth are just a curse. The more I reason, the more I feel that all this is so terrifying...]
Leaning next to Conan, Ichigo Kurosaki finished reading the first page of the diary, and couldn't help but exclaimed: "Wow, the content of this diary is really exciting! Little detective, are you still sane now? Are you going crazy, or have you already gone crazy?"
175. Monologue of the Sinner Kodo Shinichi
Although Ichigo Kurosaki had already known part of the truth by peeking into the past.
However, the different angle of observation also made Ichigo Kurosaki lack a sense of personal experience. Only after seeing what was written on the first page of the diary did Ichigo Kurosaki have a stronger sense of reality.
The information recorded in the diary, in the first few lines, was written in neat and meticulous handwriting, which showed Kudo Shinichi's character, but the handwriting became more and more sloppy as it went on, especially when there was a series of "wrong" things, it was gradually becoming a little frantic.
Kudo Shinichi, who was imprisoned in Conan Edogawa's body and whose sights, sounds and sensations were all unreal, might have already sensed something.
However, his extremely strong rationality made him subconsciously ignore these feelings that were not supported by any "evidence".
By the time Kogoro Mori died, Kudo Shinichi's handwriting had gradually developed from frenzy to collapse.
Although Kudo Shinichi tried to remain rational and record useful and objective information in his diary, it was just a habit and his handwriting revealed his true feelings.
Collapse, pain, regret, countless negative emotions intertwined and eventually turned into despair!
Kudo Shinichi narrated the truth he had deduced in his diary in his usual tone that there was only one truth, and there was an indissoluble despair between the lines.
Ichigo Kurosaki could understand that when he realized what was happening, it was already irreversible. Looking back suddenly, he found that he was the culprit. This kind of thing is not an easy thing for anyone.
If he was a born antisocial villain without blood or tears, it might be okay, but Kudo Shinichi is not a villain, he was born to be the protagonist, and a protagonist of justice and kindness.
For him, this kind of thing can no longer be described as a blow; it is simply a fatal blow to his mind and personality.
Ichigo Kurosaki felt that if those who had not embarked on the path of purity encountered such a thing in other worlds, they would probably go completely crazy when they knew the truth.
But Kudo Shinichi was not crazy, or rather, he relied on his great rationality and perseverance to suppress his despair.
Because he is the protagonist.
The protagonist does not refer to a person with a divine status, but to Kudo Shinichi, who knows about these situations and cannot sit idly by. He still wants to save and make amends, even if it is too late.
But as long as there is a glimmer of hope, he will never give up.
Everything he saw, heard and felt was an illusion. Relying on "reasoning" as his only weapon, Kudo Shinichi launched an attack.
Think, think continuously, rely on reason and knowledge to discern, to reason, to fight!
It is a fight of a trapped beast, and also a desperate struggle!
The protagonist's battle is to move towards victory. In the end, Kudo Shinichi relies on reasoning to gradually get rid of the shackles of hallucinations, auditory hallucinations and sensory hallucinations. Just like a computer understands everything about humans, after the translation of "reasoning", it re-establishes the perception of the real model.
But victory does not mean the end, because what awaits Kudo Shinichi is the abyss of truth!
Because the real situation was far more terrifying than Kudo Shinichi had expected.
But there is no turning back for Kudo Shinichi. Even if there is an abyss ahead, he must move forward.
The handwriting of the last line on the first page of the diary can no longer be described as collapse or despair. It is extreme confusion, symbolizing Kudo Shinichi's mood at the time. However, the chaotic handwriting is so powerful that it can penetrate the paper. The determination is deeply engraved in it.
Conan held the diary that belonged to him in his hands, his hands trembling slightly, but his expression was quite calm, or rather, he tried his best to calm himself, and then, he deeply imprinted the information recorded in the diary in his mind, and then analyzed it word by word, to understand it, and... to feel it!
He had no intention of escaping from the sins and crimes that were his. He would bear them all, no matter how much despair and pain were hidden within them.
This effort must have exhausted all of Conan's energy, but his efforts were not necessarily successful. His trembling hands were secondary. He tried to keep a calm expression, but could not hide the violently bulging blue veins on his face. His originally paused breathing became more and more rapid, and the rationality in his eyes began to be in jeopardy.
Conan did not hear Ichigo Kurosaki's question, but was immersed in his own world. Seeing this, Ichigo Kurosaki's spherical body squirmed, stretched out a muscled arm, clenched it into a fist, and hit Conan's head hard:
"Okay, kid, come back to your senses. If you keep thinking about this, you might have some mental problems!"
Although the world of the God of Death is not a world of cultivating immortals and does not emphasize spiritual clarity and cultivation, but as a pure martial god, he is also good at using spiritual defense methods such as purifying the heart and suppressing demons, protecting personality and mind, and the effect of one punch is extremely outstanding.
The despair and pain in Conan's mind that were about to break through his rationality were instantly blasted away by the powerful punch, and spurted out from Conan's seven orifices along with blood. The mental threshold that was already on the verge of the limit was also hammered into the chest along with the head, and became extremely stable!
Conan fell to the ground with a thud. His two short legs struggled violently for a few times, and then he became completely motionless!
But after a long time, Conan slowly got up from the ground and said in a muffled voice:
"Although my rationality tells me that I should thank you for helping me in the emergency, I would be more grateful if you were a little gentler. After all, if nothing unexpected happens, this world should be a world with detectives and cases as the main style. I am a detective, not a funny fighting character. I can't take your murderous punch..."
Ichigo Kurosaki smiled and said, "Okay, let's not worry about these insignificant things. By the way, are you okay now?"
Conan took a deep breath. "Fortunately, the contents of the diary are roughly the same as what I deduced before, but the details are even worse than I expected. The first page of the diary records more than three million and nearly four million cases. I can't imagine how much time has passed..."
Conan couldn't estimate that period of time, because there was no definite answer as to how many cases he had to deal with in a day.
Maybe it happens several times a day, or maybe it happens once every few days?
Moreover, how long a case will last is also an unknown. Conan looks back on the past and finds that among the cases he handled, there were some that were quick and could be completed in a few hours, but there were also some that took several days to deal with.
At this time, Kurosaki Ichigo gave an answer: "There is no need to think about it deliberately. Based on my observation and feeling, these three or four million cases may have lasted longer than you think. There is no evidence for this, it is just a hunch. Perhaps, one case is the real "day" for this world?"
Although it was called intuition, Ichigo Kurosaki still glanced at the insect arrow in Conan's arms, which was the small time axis organized by God's hand.
The "time" inside is extremely terrifying in length!
Conan wanted to laugh, but the smile was unusually heavy: "One case equals one day? That is in line with the definition of this world. Then, roughly speaking, three or four million cases are equivalent to about ten thousand years."
Ten thousand years is the "time" defined by the world. As for one day in the world, how long is it equivalent to for the living beings living in it? This is a number that cannot be guessed. Maybe it is ten times, maybe it is a hundred times, no one can say for sure. What is more important is that it is only the time recorded on the first page of the diary.
But no matter what, Conan has already vaguely grasped the key to the origin of everything.
The time that is so long that there is no visible end is the beginning of eternity!
No one is spared from the disaster.
Then, Conan continued his subconscious reasoning. This time, with the help of clues from the diary, his reasoning became smoother and more accurate.
In the endless time of nearly four million cases, everyone is constantly accompanied by the terrifying existence called "Edogawa Conan", who is constantly performing endless crime-solving dramas in Beika Town. They have no way to escape, and they can't even refuse, because as long as "Edogawa Conan" wants, even if they hide, "Edogawa Conan" can still find them and pull them into the drama involuntarily...
In this situation, the closer people are to Edogawa Conan, the easier it is for them to collapse!
It is difficult for Conan to know who the first one to have problems is Ai, the girl in the diary whom Conan does not know yet, or Ran Mouri. But there is no point in knowing, because the result has already been born. They both gradually collapsed and then went crazy!
After reasoning to this point, Conan felt that his rationality was shaky again, but this time, there was no need for Ichigo Kurosaki to take action. Conan took out a knife and gestured at his neck, but found that his head was hammered into his chest by Ichigo Kurosaki, and it was inconvenient to cut his neck, so he stabbed his head into his chest. Watching the blood spurting out, his rationality seemed to have recovered a little.
"Conan, you may not be a comedic character, but your performance is getting closer and closer to that line..."
Ichigo Kurosaki lowered his eyes slightly, and watched Conan "backhand" take out a fruit knife from an empty place, and then stabbed himself in the heart, but he was still alive and kicking. He knew that as Conan got closer and closer to the truth, he was also regaining his protagonist power bit by bit.
The supreme eternal true God is gradually showing his proper appearance.
"Okay, I admit that I can't be killed by punching, kicking, stabbing or shooting. I do seem to have a talent for being a comedian. Maybe I should change my name from the famous detective Kudo Shinichi to the evil god Kudo Shinichi."
When Conan stabbed himself just now, he was actually gambling.
But the result made Conan unable to laugh at all.
His body was completely free of pretense, as if silently expressing...
You can use your knife as you like, at least I'm bleeding, so it gives some face to other laws. But you want me to die? That's impossible!
The answer is so clear and so cold.
In fact, Conan knew the answer as early as when Ichigo Kurosaki beat him and sent him flying everywhere, and even just now when Ichigo Kurosaki punched his head into the chest.
How could anyone survive being beaten like that?
But Conan still had a glimmer of hope, thinking that if he stabbed himself, there might be some other situations!
But the result is the same as always.
Reason told Conan that it was meaningless to try further. If he really died, he would not have been alive until now.
"Forget it, no matter what I should be called, there are some things I must face..."
Conan picked up the diary that had fallen to the ground after being punched by Kurosaki Ichigo. He took a deep breath and opened it again, skipping the first page and looking directly at the second page. Kurosaki Ichigo also leaned over again:
[I must deduce, and I can only deduce. I must find the truth...]
[I discovered something terrible. I was imprisoned in the body of "Edogawa Conan". The time I spent thinking and reasoning did not seem to be completely connected with the time in the outside world. I couldn't calculate how much time I spent on each thought and reasoning...]
[This puzzle is unexpectedly simple. The answer appeared a long time ago. My perception of "time" has been wrong and incomplete from the beginning. I don't have a real concept of time perception. This is bad. This means that the real time represented by the four million cases may be longer than I expected. After such a long time, is there really anything I can do...]
[It seems that something worse has happened. "Edogawa Conan" has walked out of Beika Town and appeared in various parts of the world. More cases have finally appeared. Damn it, why can't I remember the time? How long has it been since Uncle Maori died?! ! ? ]
[I have gradually touched upon the truth, but it is worse and more desperate than I thought. According to reasoning, everyone is more or less crazy, and I am the culprit. Beihua Town is like a devil's den, constantly creating cases, just to provide a never-ending detective drama for the evil god named "Edogawa Conan"...]
[In the hallucination, I see more and more incongruities. When they face me, is that a "smile" on their faces? I really can't tell. If it is a "smile", why are they so desperate...]
[Anyone can despair, but you, Kudo Shinichi, can't. Take action, continue reasoning, and you must find the truth, and then try... to do something! ]
[I hate and curse my own rationality, because this rationality is unwilling to give me even the self-deceiving escape. Today, I saw my father, Kudo Yusaku, and my mother, Kudo Yukiko. According to the information obtained from the visual and auditory hallucinations, today is the release date of the unprecedented virtual reality game "Cocoon", and my father provided the script for this virtual reality game. Huiyuan, Xiaolan, Dr. Agasa and others, and I were invited to participate in this virtual game conference...]
【It is not like this moment. I sincerely hope that what I see, hear, and feel are all real. Everything is just an unprecedented virtual game conference. But my hateful and pathetic rationality tells me that everyone in the field, when they look at me, their "smiles" are full of endless hatred, and their "gentle" eyes when they look at me are full of murderous curses. Everyone who participated in this conference, including my parents, wants to... kill me! 】
[Thanks to my rationality, it can always eliminate some unnecessary emotional interference, allowing me to see clearly and make the most rational choice. If I can die here, it may be a good thing for everyone, so, everyone, come and kill me! ]
[What is their plan? Where is their trap? When will their offensive begin? How can I cooperate with them? Detective Kudo Shinichi, you can do it. You can definitely do it. Then, everyone will be fine, and you will be the only one who dies here...]
[Why can’t I die, why, why, why…]
[The script written by my father was very exciting, but unfortunately, the ghost buried in Baker Street was not me. In the end, the ending reflected in the hallucinations, auditory hallucinations and sensory hallucinations was that the "cocoon" was controlled by artificial intelligence, and a series of failures occurred, and finally it exploded. Many people at the press conference were killed, including my parents...]
[All of this is so ridiculous and absurd. The murderer is obviously me. It is me, Kudo Shinichi, who has harmed everyone. It is me. Is there anyone who can bring me to justice? Who can kill me...]
[I seem to have collapsed, but I seem to be pulled back by reason. But it doesn’t matter. As I gradually build up my perception of reality through reasoning, what I have to do next is very clear. Through the sacrifice of my father and mother, I already know that it is not that simple for me to die. I must deduce the necessary conditions for the death of "Kudo Shinichi"...]
[The reason for Kudo Shinichi's death is harder than I thought. I lack too much necessary information. I need more time. The absurd thing is that I don't lack time. On the contrary, I have too much time. So much that no one can bear it...]
[The detectives are here. Many of them are only famous but have never met. Today, they are gathered together, laughing and talking happily. Are they discussing how to kill Kudo Shinichi? As a detective, I am also among them, laughing, laughing happily. Come on, you who are responsible for being detectives, you can definitely do it...]
[Shitty detectives, a bunch of worthless trash, I'm already injured, I'm already bleeding, but I'm still alive, I'm still alive and well, how come you're all dead, how can you die, get up, how can you stop here before you kill the sinner Kudo Shinichi!!!]
[I was wrong. This was more terrifying than I had imagined. I didn't want them to die, but the detectives stood up again. They smiled and said that they were just acting. But through reasoning, I knew how terrifying and hideous they looked now. In fact, there was no need to reason. I glanced at it inadvertently, as if I had seen through the illusion. I saw the bloody head of a detective, which I held in my hand, and then raised to talk to me...]
[I understand, I finally understand, it's not just me, it's not that easy for other people to die, but fortunately, their death conditions seem to be much simpler than mine...]
[I couldn't sit by and watch the detectives continue to live in such a pathetic manner, so I forced myself to continue the unfinished story. As a result, the detectives died and rested in peace. If I had to give this scene a name, I think "Detectives' Requiem" would be more appropriate...]
[Perhaps, before the sinner named Kudo Shinichi reaches the truth of death, I should consider letting others be freed first...]
[If, in the visions and auditory hallucinations, I, a seemingly righteous detective, am the culprit of everything, then Gin, who has been chasing me, should be a hero who seems evil but is actually righteous. In that case, can he kill me? ]
[I met Gin again. This time, I tried a little and he was indeed different. His attack alleviated my hallucinations a little, but in other words, I seemed to be waking up. But is this good news? Even if I reasoned, I couldn't figure out what kind of horror I would see when I really opened my eyes from the hallucination...]
[After the detective died, I was always invited to participate in many activities. I gradually realized that the plan they prepared for this should be a "theater version" different from ordinary cases...]
[I don’t know how long it took, many people came, I expected them to free me, if they couldn’t, then I would let them free…]
[I don’t know how long it took, many people died, one after another...]
[That guy named Kyogoku Makoto was really heavy-handed. And, unlike the others, his attack was very effective. I was "hurt" badly, and even the world seemed to know it. In recent days, there have been fewer cases. Is this good news? No, it's just another innocent person who died before me...]
[I met Suzuki Sonoko. She was crying and talking about how she had been heartbroken again and why she couldn't find a good man. But I knew very well that these were all illusions...]
[I felt Suzuki Sonoko's despair, and vaguely heard her longing. I even began to glimpse a corner of the real world...]
[The person standing in front of me, is that really Suzuki Sonoko, or is she just a lonely ghost who has been tortured by despair and completely collapsed? ]
