again and again.
again and again……
How did Xia Yibing survive?
she does not know.
Maybe she had deceived herself, as Ethan said - established a solid logic.
Negative emotions cannot affect a person who does not care about emotions at all.
If that's the case, then indeed, it might not be a good thing for Aisuen-Hitschfeld to establish a close friendship with her.
Thinking of this, the girl suddenly felt that the grievance she had suffered was nothing.
"Should I apologize to her?"
When she asked this question, her face turned red like a ripe apple.
I understand it, but I still feel aggrieved and a little ashamed.
It was me who was treated unfairly...
Why do I have to apologize in the end?
And I was actually convinced...
"Don't do that!" Ethan was shocked by the thought.
"I know you mean well... Hitzfeld, we all know that. But this kind of thing can't be solved with just good intentions."
"If you apologize, it will only deepen her current guilt towards you. It will do her no good but only harm in reconsolidating that logic, and it may even accelerate its collapse."
"Then I should..."
"Just keep the status quo. Do what you did when your relationship wasn't that close... Give her some time to get used to your presence."
That night, when he checked into the hotel arranged by Shadow Lion, Hitzfeld still couldn't figure out what was going on.
It's not that she hasn't thought it through. She understands the logic. She just thinks that "having to apologize after being flirted with, and then being told that she can't even apologize, and has to cooperate with the acting and wait for the person who flirted with her to come over on his own" is a bit too outrageous.
"What else can I do..."
Sitting at the table, she wrote and drew on the notebook in a huff.
"She saved my life and told me all those things..."
Somewhat distraught.
Ethan believed that the friendship between them was pure, and might also include a substitute family affection, which meant that Xia Yibing might subconsciously regard her as a dead sister.
Hitzfeld didn't mind him thinking so, because that was what she had always thought - Xia Yibing was Hitzfeld's best friend.
But after experiencing that charming moment of eye contact, she felt that this might not be the case.
The problem is not on her side.
At Xia Yibing's place.
She reviewed the whole process from when she and Xia Yibing met to when they became acquainted.
In one sentence:
Although profound, it is not special.
It is far from the level that should produce a relationship beyond friendship.
"Then why does she always do things to me?"
She doesn't understand.
She didn't think she was that attractive.
The other party doesn't seem like a frivolous person.
Her impression of Xia Yibing could be condensed into a few words: calm, composed, rational, and decisive.
Such a person will not fall in love easily, and my experience with her will not make her fall in love.
After thinking for a long time, Hitzfeld felt that the most likely possibility was that... Xia Yibing had been suppressing her inner emotions for so long that she had become a little abnormal.
Ok.
To put it bluntly, it's "hunger".
She refuses to interact emotionally with others, but at the same time she is a human being, and humans are social animals, and without interaction they will suffer from mental illness.
At this critical juncture, she, Hitzfeld, appeared.
She had been inside her mind and witnessed her worst nightmares.
Although he wouldn't treat her differently, perhaps this incident could serve as a trigger to guide Xia Yibing to gradually change his attitude towards her.
It just so happened that they were separated for more than three months.
So her behavior towards me was... a withdrawal reaction?
As he was thinking about it, Hitzfeld turned to the previous page and saw various lines drawn on it with red ink, and a cartoon portrait of Xia Yibing in the middle.
She blew her kisses while sitting in the car, with a seductive look on her face, which perfectly combined some of her original evil fantasies.
Hitzfeld's face suddenly darkened.
She looked around, turned the pages of the book like a thief, muttered reluctant words like "impossible" and "it has nothing to do with me", and forced herself to start studying late at night.
The effect is naturally not very good.
Until 4 o'clock in the morning, she still couldn't get into the mood, and her mind was full of the scene of the woman with a red face pressing on her.
Let’s ignore whether there are external causes for this.
If I had been more proactive...
Will she...
Will it be...
Hitzfeld's meager knowledge was not enough to support her continued fantasy, so in the end, she began to wonder how two girls would do such a thing.
In the process, her reasoning skills kicked in. She listed seven possibilities and began to explore them with a scientific attitude.
"From a biological and evolutionary perspective, this is completely wrong."
she thought.
"Then why is this behavior still so common..."
She was thinking about a lot of things, and just as she was flipping through the book quickly and considering whether to move her bedtime privileges forward to today to avoid this torment, she suddenly saw a passage between the pages.
[Corrupted...]
stop!
Reaching out and pressing the page of paper, Hitzfeld opened the book completely and began to read the passage carefully.
[Form of Corruption]
[In common knowledge, only those spread by nightmares and evil curses are corrupted, and only those contaminated by this kind of corruption can become monsters.]
[I would say that this is not the case at all. There is another kind of corruption where one is affected by nightmares and gives up resistance psychologically.]
[The former is from the outside in, the latter is from the inside out. Corruption from the inside out will have a greater impact on the 'egg'.]
[When it completely loses control, and certain conditions are met, the creature born from its egg sheath is no longer simply called a 'nightmare'.]
[That was the evil thought that condensed from the abyss of despair.]
[My personal guess is that they are also the embryonic forms of God.]
Chapter 7 The Corruptor
What on earth is this——
After reading this description, Hitzfeld quickly turned the book to the beginning.
It's embarrassing to say... Although she took this book out of the box herself, and even wrote a lot of copied notes in her little notebook, she hadn't even read its title before this moment.
It’s all Xia Yibing’s fault.
A complaining thought flashed through my mind.
Without looking in the mirror, she could tell from the burning sensation that her face had turned red again.
"Let's take a look at this book first..." Shaking his head and completely discarding these things, Hitzfeld stared at the large gold-plated words at the front of the page.
"Origin of the Evil God" ◎ Sara ◎ Nosa Ferdinand
Well……
She frowned and pondered.
Ignoring the author's name which may be hard to remember the first time you read it, the title of this book is quite impressive.
Yes, she remembered that she had chosen this book because she was attracted by its grand title when she was choosing which books to bring.
It seems that no matter what era or background, cultural and creative work is inevitably associated with clickbait titles. It’s just that people in this era are relatively simple, and the content of this book is indeed related to the so-called evil god.
Hitzfeld finally got into the mood. She cheered herself up, temporarily put aside the idea of taking notes, and started from the first page, intending to read the book carefully again.
At daybreak, the hustle and bustle of the city outside gradually came.
Hitzfeld glanced at the clock. It was not yet half past five.
The hotel arranged by Shadow Lion is not far from the pier, and the sailors always have endless work to do. Considering that this is the bustling Port of Wayne...it is normal for this situation to occur.
Putting down the book, Hitzfeld yawned loudly.
She had a feeling that after entering the "one sleep a week" recovery program, she became more sleepy on weekdays.
She speculated that it was not because her body was more tired, her body should be recovering gradually, but her will - gradually could not withstand the temptation.
What is the saying?
If I had never seen the sun, perhaps I could endure the darkness.
Hitzfeld, well, she had slept before. But that was a long time ago, and before she got the fake ring, her physical and mental condition was much worse than it is now, but she could endure it at that time, probably because of habit.
And now, she can find one night every week, wash herself clean and throw herself into the bed, wrapped in the quilt, and completely merge with the bed in her sleep.
She had rediscovered the joy of sleep, so naturally, the sleeplessness of everyday life seemed even more tormenting.
There was no hot water in the hotel, so Hitzfeld simply washed himself with cold water, smelled his socks, frowned, took them off, and changed into another pair.
Breakfast was pumpkin honey pie. It is similar to a pie, with a thin crust on the outside, baked to a crispy brown, and a large amount of pumpkin pulp mixed with syrup inside. It is delicious when you bite it, and it is the best delicacy when eaten with barley tea.
"Is it delicious?"
In the hall, Ethan sat opposite the girl, watching her crunching the biscuits like a squirrel, with an expression of joy at sharing success on her face.
"I came here when I was a kid, and I've always missed the taste... I have to say that Grandma Asimo's cooking skills are really great, and most importantly, she hasn't raised the price in 22 years. A piece of cake only costs becquerels."
Hitzfeld nodded in agreement: Wayne Port is a political and economic center, and this price is indeed not expensive.
She was also very picky about food. On the one hand, it was natural, and on the other hand, when she began to suffer from insomnia, she found that when the sun rose and she had to adjust her spirit to adapt to the new day, being meticulous about food could help her recover faster.
She interprets this as a kind of psychological hypnosis, a reward mechanism - reminding herself that it is the next day by enjoying a delicious breakfast.
"Where's Xia?"
After eating and drinking, Hitzfeld stared at a plate of bitter grapefruit salad, glancing up the stairs from time to time.
"She gets up earlier than the rest of us." Ethan told her not to worry about it. "She is responsible for part of your review. Bringing you here doesn't mean the work is over. She also has to report on what happened in this line."
"She won't..."
"Probably not. That is the agent's personal emotional problem. We have a special psychological counseling department to handle related issues."
"I have something to ask you." Hitzfeld said hesitantly, "It's... nightmares. The spirit you mentioned before, it borrows power from nightmares."
"Yes, that's right."
"Is its side effect just to endure the erosion of negative emotions?" She frowned, "If she can't withstand the erosion of negative emotions... I mean, she is only human, and humans have a limit to their psychological endurance..."
"Yes, there is a question." Ethan was a little surprised that she would ask this, but he still patiently explained to her, "So the extraordinary people at the present spirit level are very precious - and also very dangerous. On the one hand, they can manipulate the power of nightmares, but on the other hand, they may not be able to withstand the erosion of those evil thoughts and be contaminated by the evil spirits in the nightmares - the evil spirits that are completely imagined from their inner world, and become egg sheaths that hatch nightmares."
"Wouldn't that be——"
