If you read more of what I have written, you may have a feeling that the points I aim to portray, some of which I hope to lead to touching points, are located in a way that is different from that of most of my works.
I know this is weird, and I also find some of the points weird when I look back. On the one hand, this is because my threshold for being touched is relatively high - I have to be touched myself before I dare to say that I can touch others, and secondly, my understanding of being touched is rather weird.
One of the goals of the Ice Lake chapter is maternal love, and mother. It is no exaggeration to say that these things have long been written about in various themes. In this case, it is really a headache to challenge such a goal, because no matter what angle I use to portray it, similar techniques, routines, plots... readers have already seen them in other works. Everyone knows that movie spoilers are disgusting, and this is equivalent to another kind of spoiler - if someone guesses what I want to do halfway through writing, then the moment when the plot finally breaks out will definitely not bring the expected emotional outburst. The power of the text in the article is not enough, and it is unqualified.
At this point, I must mention the influence of a horror-themed game on me - "Dream Diary".
I won’t introduce this game in detail. Some people think it is boring, while others think it is a masterpiece, but I did feel deeply moved by it as the reviews said.
“When you cut through the thorns and kill the monsters that stand in your way and grow from your dreams, and then at a certain moment you discover that they have no intention of hurting you at all, you realize that they are all from your own fantasy, from the fear, loneliness, emptiness and despair in your heart, and they are all born from this - at that moment, you finally understand yourself completely.”
This is the comment, I guess. What kind of logic do I see in it?
From [hating monsters] to [understanding monsters], and then from [understanding monsters] to [self-reconciliation].
Fear is definitely one of the most intense emotions among human beings. The desire to survive, kill, and reproduce that are generated by fear need no further introduction. However, under the control of such extreme emotions, you suddenly discover that the thing you have been afraid of does not want to harm you, but has a close relationship with you and even loves you deeply. It follows you not to scare you, but just to hug you again...
I have to say that humans are mean and like to go to extremes. I think in this situation, I would easily jump from one extreme - extreme fear - to another extreme - extreme emotion.
The emotion induced in this way is so magnificent, it carries with it the hope that bursts out after surviving despair. This also has a misleading effect on emotions, as they should be superimposed and grow in a multiplicative manner.
Because of this, Yume Nikki has a special place in my heart. Other horror games can only be scary, but Yume Nikki can make me reconcile with myself, let me realize the truth at the last moment, and even actively embrace the darkness that I once deeply feared.
Of course, I did not fully use this method in the Ice Lake arc, because it was a bit difficult to make Aisuen feel fear and despair at her level... The despair here is mainly extracted from the end of the Crown arc. If you look into it more deeply, there is also the fact that humans have an emotional sense of guilt, similar to when you suspect someone has stolen your things and you are very wary of him for a while, but later when the things are found by yourself, you feel sorry for that person and will unconsciously try to please him, and so on.
Judging from the feedback, the effect is good.
I was very apprehensive, and finally I didn’t write a bad Laurel character.
I don't dare to take credit for myself, I still have a lot to learn. I just hope I can continue to follow this idea and keep bringing out better stories.
Chapter 1 Apprentice Goddess
When the last gust of autumn wind tried to move towards winter, Hitzfeld was about to celebrate his 20th birthday.
Of course, her real birthday was not in November, but after all, that was her past on Earth. She thought that she should carry out her will to live here with a new identity, so her advent day became her birthday here.
Hitzfeld didn't want to make a big fuss about this. It wasn't that she felt that having obtained the "wedge to becoming a god" would create a gap between herself and her mortal friends, but she didn't want to make too much noise. She was worried that it would be bad for the fetus in her belly.
But Xia Yibing refused.
She attached great importance to Hitzfeld's 20th birthday, because in Sara, 20 is a real watershed. People aged 16 or younger can be called boys and girls. People aged 17 and above but under 20 are vaguely called boys, girls, or young men.
But it is no longer the case when one is over 20 years old. People generally believe that 20 is the age of "real maturity". No matter how decadent or rotten a person is before that, he/she should understand some things after his/her 20th birthday.
"Sarah's law is not perfect in this regard," Xia Yibing told Hitzfeld at the time. "The Wayne Law stipulates that both men and women become adults at the age of 18, but in some places, the age of adulthood is 16 or even 15. You have to know that even though these places have such different perceptions of 'legal adulthood', they still unanimously believe that the 20th birthday is the most important for a person."
That’s probably the difference between “physical adulthood” and “mental adulthood”, right?
Hitzfeld knew this statement. After all, she had read a lot of books and understood the difficulties Sarah faced under the invasion of the gray fog.
In a civilized society where the average life expectancy was once less than 50 years old, how can you demand uniform standards of adulthood everywhere?
It is not uncommon for people to get married and have children at the age of 16, which was a common phenomenon more than a decade ago. In some areas, there are even people who get married at a younger age, which is actually out of helplessness.
What is the original meaning of marriage? Is it because of love?
It's not like that... It's more like a "marriage" than a "marriage". They are willing to do this because they both think that living alone will be very tiring and painful, and that living together will be much better.
So it is obvious that the main factor for early marriage at a young age is that life is hard. People live in fear of nightmares all day long, and this fear stimulates the instinctive desire of life to continue genes. These factors combine to make it like that.
This is Hitzfeld's personal opinion.
Since it is a helpless act, there will naturally be many hidden dangers. In this regard, family conflicts and domestic violence are minor issues. Sarah's civilization has not yet developed to the point where these issues are used as a fuss. It is good enough to have enough food, warm clothes and live a good life.
On this basis, the Sara people are naturally precocious.
Hitzfeld heard on Earth that people are established at the age of 30, which means that the Earthlings define "psychological maturity" at the age of 30. This is a full ten years later than the Sara people's insistence on the age of 20. From this set of data, we can see how hard life is here.
That seems to be the truth, right?
It’s like the ancient feudal dynasties on Earth… Although people got married very early at that time, and many people became parents at the age of 16, at least they didn’t worry about losing their lives while sleeping at home…
Hitzfeld understands the reason, and she also said that she can understand that "20 years old is very important here", but she still doesn't think it is necessary to hold a grand party for such an event - it's not to that extent at all.
Oh my god...how did I celebrate my 18th and 19th birthdays?
I can't quite remember, but I guess at best I invited a few friends to my house? Or maybe I simply forgot about it...
Because this was just a fake birthday to adapt to local customs. Even if it was her real birthday, she would not bother to pay much attention to it unless she was taken to Hitzfell Manor to celebrate with her mother-in-law and aunts.
It's not that she's being pretentious or careless, but she thinks her birthday is equivalent to her mother's Good Friday. With this thought in mind, she looks back on her motherless childhood...how could she possibly want to celebrate?
Therefore, Hitzfeld's indifference to birthdays was caused by many complex factors. Xia Yibing certainly couldn't see through all of them. She just simply felt that she should be compensated more, and she wanted to report it to the White Shadow Palace and let the White Shadow Palace hold a super banquet specifically for Count Xie Yang.
"November 11th...right?"
Hitzfeld still remembers Alwin's playful expression at that time.
“It’s the last day of Ramadan, a very meaningful day.”
During Ramadan, the yang will last longer at night, and the frequency of evil spirits will be greatly reduced. Sara people will spend dozens of days of relative peace and tranquility during Ramadan. They will bathe more, change clothes more, pray more, and pursue light food and water.
Hitzfeld happened to come on the last day of Ramadan, which seemed like... the goddess knew that the people on earth would suffer from evil spirits tomorrow, so she sent an angel down to rescue them.
"I don't mind hosting a cocktail party for Aisuen. After all, Aisuen is so beautiful now. I think there will be a lot of Wang Guojunjies who are interested in her~"
The young queen smiled like a white-haired fox at that moment, with her eyes curved, as if she was very happy to see the embarrassment of her important minister.
"Is... is that so?" Xia Yibing's eyes widened. "But hasn't she already..."
She turned to look at Hitzfeld, her eyes falling on her silver-gray hair that was tied up.
"Oh! That means our security chief is still a little naive." Nian Lun stood beside the throne, and said in a sarcastic tone, "You have handled many cases of extramarital affairs leading to murders. Do you think that if you tie up the lamb, no one will steal it?"
"That's not the case, my dear Ms. Imaar. Tying up the lamb will only arouse some people's desire to conquer. You know, Wayne is not short of those guys who have a few extra dollars in their pockets and have nothing to do all day, and they love to break taboos the most."
"They dare--" Xia Yibing was furious, "Then let's not do it! There's no need to let them know in the first place!"
"But there are some things you can't hide." Alvin sighed, and took the memorial from Nian Lun, "Let me see... um... headed by the Larence family, a total of 64 people hope that I can celebrate the Earl's birthday."
Hitzfeld didn't find this unusual.
Her birthday was no secret. She had never felt it was important and had no intention of hiding it.
Besides, she hadn't been knighted at that time. What would happen if she was just a little detective and leaked a fake birthday? Did she have to worry about the whole city coming to join in the fun?
But it's different now.
Those people outside don’t know what they have gained from the Depp-Valtina Ice Lake. Just from those people’s perception, she is also a "high-ranking official". Her 20th birthday is a great opportunity to curry favor with her and build a relationship with her.
Otherwise, how come gift-giving is also a science... Hitzfeld has seen many people who want to give gifts, but either because of face or because they are born with a poor tongue, they don't know how to express themselves when they meet.
Send it directly, and then make the request?
It's too tacky, and the person receiving the gift will feel embarrassed.
Oh, is this all my dignity and personality are worth? I see you are not asking for my help at all, you are just trying to insult me!
In the end, the goods were not delivered and the thing I wanted to do fell through.
So the reason for giving gifts is very important, and there is no better reason than birthdays or special holidays. Some of those people want to make friends with her and some want to ease the relationship with her. It would be strange not to seize this opportunity.
But they were destined to be disappointed. After returning to House No. 221, Xia Yibing angrily tore the joint letter to pieces and scolded Lawrence for making things more difficult.
"Come on, James doesn't know about us..."
"No! He deserves to be scolded!"
It's rare to see a willful security chief, especially one who is willful for himself. Hitzfeld felt curious and warm in her heart, and she couldn't help but want to tease the woman.
"So will the party still be held?"
"It can't be done!"
"Oh...what about my birthday?"
"We can go back to the manor."
Xia Yibing's proposal was quite standard.
"Your hometown is so big...right? We can invite all the friends we know to come over. If Your Majesty is willing, you can also go."
No? Am I digging my own grave?
Now it was Hitzfeld's turn to be dumbfounded.
She could never have imagined that such a rebellious plan would come out of Xia Yibing's mouth - is this still the Captain Shadow Lion who was so respectful to Her Majesty the Queen?
She felt that Xia Yibing had become arrogant and her attitude towards Alvin was no longer one of "reverence".
The "respect" is retained, but the "fear" is becoming less and less visible.
Now that's great. I had wanted to take this opportunity to completely cancel the plan, but ended up moving the stall from No. 221 to Hitzfell Manor. This, this, this... won't I be even busier?
Count the number of friends.
The Security Bureau includes Ethan, Darent, Zafira, Sixus and Luxil...
The members of the cult include Thores and Cybertron, and Frick seems to be coming too...
If Alvin comes, then Nian Lun will definitely come out of worry. If Nian Lun comes, how can Heidi not come?
They are all big eaters, so how much food do we have to prepare?
"It certainly won't keep you busy."
Xia Yibing patted her chest and made the promise.
Are you kidding? She is a high-ranking official after all. It’s impossible for her to not have enough people to investigate the case, but how can she not have enough people to cook?
If you really can't do it, just do it yourself. She has also studied cooking specifically for Hitzfeld. She was the one who cooked all the dishes on the Red Soil Plains!
Thinking of this, she suddenly became motivated again and flew back to her study to write letters and make phone calls. She was busy all afternoon.
"I think she's crazy."
The Blood Crystal Crow flew to the dining table and watched the woman running upstairs with Hitzfeld.
"Although it didn't work out, you have already obtained the 'qualification', and you finally gave the 'qualification' to her."
"Does she understand that she can now be considered a goddess?"
A goddess personally serves a group of mortals and cooks a banquet for them?
After killing the Blood Crystal Crow, she never imagined that such a thing could happen in the world.
She is a hairy goddess...
Hitzfeld propped up his cheeks, crossed his legs under his skirt and watched the show.
At best, it's an apprenticeship.
Ok.
Apprentice goddess.
...It sounds quite funny when it's called.
Chapter 2 Goddess School
On November 11, Hitzfeld's birthday party was held as planned at the manor.
A lot of people did come. Except for the duo of priests and a few others who were busy with their missions, almost all the people on the list that Hitzfeld mentioned in the previous chapter came.
Including Alwin - are you kidding? This is a rare opportunity to get rid of government affairs and the discipline of the annual rings and sneak out of the palace to get some fresh air. How could she let it go? Of course she was going to come here to eat a lot!
As expected, Year Ring followed. Hitzfeld recognized her in the crowd at a glance, because everyone was drinking happily except her. Darent, who didn't care about his relatives, even tried to play drinking and finger-guessing games with His Majesty the King. Year Ring's face was as dark as if the entire tree people were extinct. Hitzfeld was worried that she would not be able to control herself and throw Darent out of the window. Fortunately, she finally restrained herself.
All I can say is that they came at the perfect time, just like last time, in the latter part of the party. By this time, most people were drunk and looked very dim, and even if Elwin was not wearing a veil or makeup, few people would be able to recognize her.
"How do you feel, my Lord?"
As the conversation was about to end, Alvin took Hitzfeld to the balcony to enjoy the fresh air, chat and sober up.
The king took a few sips of the fruit wine. Although the alcohol content was low, he should not forget that her body had not yet recovered.
"Not very good." Hitzfeld answered truthfully, "I don't want so many people to waste their time on me."
At first glance, it seems that she is ungrateful. This is a great honor. If the noble ministers heard it in private, they would scold her to death.
But she really thought so. She was indeed very happy today, but this happiness was because she could get together and chat with people she knew. She felt that most of them were still healthy under the gray fog, and she cherished this time from the bottom of her heart.
But she really didn't want these people to come just to celebrate her birthday. Even if it was the twentieth birthday, which was the most important birthday for Sara people, she didn't think it was anything special.
