Chapter 106: Vice President's Battle
Yu Qian was stunned by the arrogant “Qian’er”, and then smiled: “Hey, Vice President!”
Luan Yunping patted him on the shoulder and said, "You are older than me, and you have a higher generation than me, but I am still too proud to call you Qian'er!"
"Of course I should!" Yu Qian nodded flatteringly.
Luan Yunping opened his hands: "Do you see what I have in my hands? There's Qian'er, and there's you!"
After saying that, he clenched his hands.
"Oh, I'm in your hand."
"Yes, I am Mr. Guo's favorite disciple, the most beloved disciple among so many disciples, and I am also the vice president of Deyun. Let me tell you in secret, from now on, whether you participate in special performances, commercial performances, whether you go abroad, whether you go on a ship, it's all arranged by me. If you are close to me, won't you get less benefits?"
Yu Qian quickly flattered: "We are not far away!"
"Eh, even if you don't participate in the commercial performance?"
"Huh?" Yu Qian's face changed, confused.
"I can transfer the money to you too!"
Yu Qian's confused face immediately became happy again, even happier than before. After a "hehe" sound, he said to Luan Yunping: "Then try to perform less and pay more!"
"So you have to be clear about who you're playing with and who you're not. Some people are jealous of me being the vice president and spread the word that I'm showing off. If they don't toast me, I'll make things difficult for them. Am I that kind of person? Am I putting on airs as the vice president?"
"Ugh!" The audience and the crosstalk performers booed.
After all this time of being so arrogant, he even calls Yu Qian "Qian'er", but he still doesn't act like a vice president? This is really like a father, teaching people, reminding people, hinting people, and he is older than you.
Yu Qian, however, was intent on flattering: "I haven't done that before. Isn't that very kind?"
"So, it's certain people who are trying to sow discord between us. You must not fall into their trap!"
Yu Qian suddenly realized and immediately expressed his loyalty: "Don't mention certain people, I'm reporting Qi Long, I'm going to draw a clear line between myself and him!"
"That's right, pay more attention, Qian'er!" Luan Yunping patted Yu Qian's shoulder again to show his trust.
Yu Qian finished talking to Luan Yunping, turned to look at Qi Long, and his smile disappeared immediately. He said angrily and disdainfully: "Humph!"
Just this one person who was trying to please Luan Yunping and then smiled and turned around with an angry face and snorted, immediately brought a huge contrast to the funny effect.
"What's wrong, Brother Qian?" Qi Long was puzzled.
"Luan Yunping never acts like a vice president, nor does he try to make things difficult for me!" Yu Qian spoke.
Qi Long stopped him: "Okay, okay, don't say anything, is he trying to seduce you with a commercial performance again?"
"Yes, no!"
"Of course there is, he only knows that trick. What's the point of telling you in secret? I'm in charge of the commercial performances, and I still have to tell you in secret. Only gorillas hit their breasts!" Qi Long said, imitating the gorilla and pounding his chest. He pounded it too hard and it came out.
Add the homophonic baggage together and it will immediately make the scene explode.
He needs to be a little crazy in this scene, because Luan Yunping plays the image of a high-handed vice president. In a group crosstalk, when two people fight each other, it is best to have two different styles, with distinct characters and different effects of the jokes.
After the laughter, Qi Long continued, "Did he still say that he was a beloved disciple? What beloved disciple? That's an eyesore, an obstruction, a hindrance!"
"Ah? You're such a hindrance!"
"No, he wanted to curry favor with his master, so he drove Mr. Guo to the Ghost-Seeing Cliff. He ended up driving on the wrong road and wasted a lot of gas. When he was going down the mountain, he ran out of gas, so Mr. Guo had to push the car with him all night. When they arrived at the Imperial Capital, it was already daybreak!"
Luan Yunping, who was eavesdropping, whispered into the microphone, "My master just arrived in time to watch the flag-raising ceremony!" This caused a burst of laughter.
Qi Long couldn't hear Luan Yunping's words, so he continued, "Think about it, why did the driver change to Hou Zhen? He's the one who's in the way!"
"Oh!" Yu Qian suddenly realized.
Qi Long continued to give examples: "Also, wherever Mr. Guo goes, he always follows him. When he goes to your house to meet your wife to keep in touch with her, he always follows her. Isn't that a nuisance?"
"You'll have to ask my wife about that!" Yu Qian used his classic stage persona, accepting everything he was told and pretending to be dumb.
"Then let's talk about your business. When you and Teacher Guo perform a special show, he is always there. Your special show is so popular, but once he comes on stage, the show is cold, and you two have to warm up the audience again. Isn't it a hindrance?"
"It's in the way!" Yu Qian agreed solemnly this time.
"Threatening you about commercial performances? Yo yo yo, let him try next and let his master do stand-up comedy. How much have you and your family contributed to Guo Degang's crosstalk career? Can he veto that?"
Yu Qian's smile reappeared on his face, and he said with arrogance: "That's right!"
"You're afraid of him?"
"I'm not afraid of him!" Yu Qian was convinced: "I'll go tell him right now that I won't bow down to power."
Yu Qian turned his head, and his expression of pride and joy immediately changed to one of anger and disdain: "Humph!"
"Qian'er!"
"What do you mean Qian'er? Call me uncle!"
"Hey," Luan Yunping's expression changed: "What kind of magic potion did Qi Long give you? Now you don't know how to respect others?"
"Who doesn't know how to respect others?" Yu Qian immediately retorted: "I am older than you, is Qian'er Qian'er ok?"
"Your uncle!"
"Fuck you! Why are you swearing at me?"
"Uncle, listen to me, you have been drugged. Everyone who has talked to Qi Long has become different!" Luan Yunping said earnestly.
Yu Qian arrogantly asked, "What has changed?" "Think about it. He Cong was such a good kid before, but now he only makes jokes on stage. Jin Henan's Nan is almost becoming the difficult Nan."
As soon as the words fell, Jin Henan in the audience immediately applauded vigorously and shouted: "Yes!"
"Look, He Lun used to be such a good kid, but now he's making all kinds of choreographies on stage about our master, Yan He Xiang, Qin Xiao Xian, Meng He Tang, and Shao Bing. None of them know how to respect their teachers!"
"But isn't that what our crosstalk is like? There is no hierarchy on stage, but we have to set the rules off stage."
"These people are almost losing their manners off the stage. Just wait and see. When the family tree is revised in a while, they may even expel their ancestors from the family tree. In the future, Deyun Society will be like Yunhe Jiuxiao and Longxin Lixiang!"
"What are the last four words?"
"Yue Longgang, Yan Xin, Zhang Limin, Meng Xianghui"
This is an internal joke of Deyun Society about picking characters. It is the original name of a Deyun actor. Guo Degang would say his apprentice's real name as a joke.
"Oh!"
"You can't be like them. Even though you are my master's partner, my master can be paired with Gao Feng, can be paired with Sun Yue, and at worst, I, his beloved disciple, can be paired with him!"
Yu Qian suddenly realized: "Yes!"
"Please be careful. He just wants to be the vice president and ruin my reputation. With an elder like you who has a keen eye, his tricks are useless!"
"Yes, he is such a treacherous villain. I almost fell into his trap!"
Yu Qian turned around and snorted at Qi Long again!
"I was almost expelled from the family tree, and my ancestors were almost exterminated!"
This time Qi Long said to Yu Qian again: "What family tree? We are not in the family tree. You Yu Qian, I Qi Long, there is no word to pick?"
"Eh, yes!"
"Can you be controlled by him? Even if you no longer work at Deyun Club, even if you no longer perform crosstalk, even if your name no longer appears in Deyun Club..."
Yu Qian didn't interrupt him at first. When Qi Long became more and more excited, he stopped him and shouted in panic:
"I'm working at Deyun Club. I'm here. Why are you asking me to leave?"
"What I mean is, even if you don't do crosstalk anymore, you're still an award-winning actor!"
"No, no, no, I still have to do crosstalk!"
"Then let's talk about crosstalk. Why do all the disciples of Mr. Guo that I have met make up stories about their master in crosstalk?"
"Why?"
"I'm doing this for you. Think about it, every time he goes on stage, he takes advantage of you, saying that your father talked about your wife. I'm helping you get revenge!"
"My brother is still good to me!"
"Look, as the queen of crosstalk, you should talk to Teacher Guo and ask Luan Yunping to step down and let me take over!"
Yu Qian was very tempted, but said helplessly: "I will sleep with the emperor now, it's not okay!"
"Don't underestimate your influence. You also have disciples. Guo Qilin is your disciple. When Guo Degang retires in the future, he will belong to Guo Qilin. The prince and the queen of crosstalk have said that my position as vice president is a foregone conclusion, isn't it?"
Qi Long promised Yu Qian that after he became the vice president, the number of commercial performances would double. Yu Qian didn't want to go for commercial performances, so the number of commercial performances was halved, but the salary would double.
Yu Qian was convinced again and looked back at Luan Yunping: "Humph!"
Luan Yunping used the same old trick again, saying that he was bewitched by Qi Long, and that Qi Long could only give it to you after he became the vice president. But I can give it to you now, he is just empty talk!
"Think about it, he's only been here for half a year and he's already thinking about usurping the throne and becoming vice president, spreading all kinds of rumors. How vicious is that? Would you dare to eat the cake of such a person? Women are the most vicious!"
Qi Long, who was eavesdropping, got angry and yelled while pinching his orchid fingers: "Luan Yunping, you're going too far!"
"What's the matter?" Luan Yunping picked up the handkerchief on the table and threw it.
The two of them were arguing like women, both were effeminate. Qi Long said, "I just cut my nails, otherwise I would scratch you to death!"
Luan Yunping said: "It's because your hair is short, otherwise I would pull it out of you."
Yu Qian tried to mediate the fight: "Alright, alright, alright, alright, doesn't Deyun Society have any female disciples?"
But he failed to hold on, Qi Long and Luan Yunping pushed him aside, and Yu Qian fell on the stage with a cry of "Ouch". The two brothers quarreled with each other, and finally they started fighting.
Yu Qian quickly shouted, and a group of people came up from the backstage and dragged the two people away.
Yu Qian got up and came to the table: "Look, they are fighting for a vice president. For the unity of Deyun Society, I think it's better for me to be the vice president!"
"Good!" Everyone cheered in agreement.
Yu Qian smiled happily: "Thank you all for your support!"
He bowed, and the crosstalk ended.
The whole audience applauded, and after Qi Long and Dong Qiang were taken backstage by the crosstalk actors, the actors laughed so hard that they bent over.
This crosstalk about the struggle and winning over Yu Qian is a typical crosstalk about internal jokes. Audiences who often watch Deyun Club and actors within Deyun Club all enjoy watching it, and it is full of jokes.
Especially the actor Yu Qian in the middle, his performance was very good, with several emotional changes, each of which made the audience laugh.
The two brothers, Qi Long, the leader of the usurper cult, and Luan Yunping, the deputy leader, countered each other's moves through Yu Qian, and their reasonable explanations and attempts to win them over also gave the audience a great sense of freshness, and their conversations brought out a lot of chuckles or hilarious jokes.
From the thunderous applause when Yu Qian left the stage, it can be seen that the audience was very satisfied with this segment!
(End of this chapter)
