Chapter 171: Drinking Order
Jiuxi started from his hobby of traveling and talked about other hobbies, then talked about some people's love of drinking, and officially got down to business.
The class rules of Deyun Society are that we are not allowed to bring alcohol on stage. We cannot drink on stage, so we use a toy air hammer to replace the alcohol. Whoever is supposed to drink, we hit it on the head, and that counts as one drink.
At the same time, drinking and playing finger-guessing games are not allowed, so try a word game.
Shang Jiuxi was in a group alone. Qi Long said that he wanted to help He Jiuhua, because he had said too many things that led to misunderstandings just now, and his nephew was unhappy, so the two of them were in a group.
Everyone finds the festivals in each month. For odd months, you should find festivals on odd dates, and for even months, you should find festivals on even dates. They must be traditional Chinese festivals. If you find the right one, it is called Zhengling, and you toast three cups, which means you should knock the other person on the head three times.
If you don't find it, it's an illegal order and you have to drink three cups of wine as a penalty. If you find it wrong, you will be hit on the head.
This job is obviously a comedy show, creating laughs by hitting people on the head, duangduang.
When talking about the rules, Qi Long and He Jiuhua switched positions. Qi Long asked how to drink? Shang Jiuxi gave He Jiuhua a drink and said, "Drink like this!"
How to toast? Shang Jiuxi hit He Jiuxi three times: That’s how to toast!
When he asked how to punish him by drinking, he was hit three more times: That’s the punishment!
He Jiuhua was hit seven times without doing anything. This kind of joke would be boring if they just hit each other, as they have to keep hitting the same person.
Therefore, Shang Jiuxi can always find the correct order of a single month and knock on He Jiuhua.
The Lantern Festival on January 15th, the Cold Food Festival on March 9th, the Dragon Boat Festival on May 5th, the Qiqiao Festival on July 7th, and the Double Ninth Festival on September 9th, that's the fifteenth day of the lunar calendar.
Qi Long couldn't find any festival during the crucial double month, so he came up with all kinds of random ideas.
February 2nd is the Dragon Raising its Head, that is the Raising Head Festival, if you don’t have it, you will be punished by drinking three cups. April 28th is the day to wear yarn randomly, that is the Wearing yarn Festival, if you don’t have it, you will be punished by watching the grain show on June 6th, if you don’t have it on the Grain Show Festival, you will be punished by watching the Flowering Festival on August 8th.
This time He Jiuhua didn't listen to Qi Long.
"I can see that they are teaming up to bully me today. I won't listen to them. August, I'll give you an August 15th! Is that right?"
The audience cheered “Yes!”
The result was still wrong, because a double month requires a festival on a double date, and He Jiuhua was beaten again.
The air hammer made a funny sound when it hit, and He Jiuhua had to close his eyes and pretend to be in pain every time he was hit. The audience encouraged him with laughter every time, and Qi Long and Shang Jiuxi laughed smugly when he hit his head.
After being beaten on the Double Ninth Festival, He Jiuhua couldn't stand it anymore and angrily accused Qi Long of messing around. All the suggestions he gave him were nonsense, none of them were right. He even called him the king of golden ideas in the planning industry, but in my opinion, he is just the king of bad ideas!
"You can't blame me, Jiuhua. He cheated and took away the odd month. Let's switch with him. Let's say we say odd month and he says even month!"
"What do you want to change? It's been more than half a year. I don't want to change it. I won't even talk about October. Let's go straight to December, the 30th day of the twelfth lunar month, New Year's Eve. Is there any?" He Jiuhua asked.
The audience yelled, “Yes!”
This time he was right. He Jiuhua threw the air hammer on the table and pointed at Shang Jiuxi: "It's your turn to drink three cups!"
Shang Jiuxi looked at the air hammer and shook his head: "I can only drink two cups!"
"why?"
"You spilled the wine on the table!" Shang Jiuxi picked up the air hammer.
He Jiuhua touched his arm: "Okay, two cups is two cups, you must drink!"
Shang Jiuxi was hit by him and dropped the air hammer. He hurriedly caught it and put it on the table, pointing at the air hammer on the table: "You spilled another cup!"
"You have to drink one cup too."
"How do you drink it?" "Drink it like I do!"
"How do you drink it?" Shang Jiuxi asked.
He Jiuhua picked up the air hammer and hit himself on the head: "Just drink it!"
"Hey, you don't have to drink any more this time, just give me the last drink!" Shang Jiuxi spread his hands proudly, shaking his head from side to side, looking smug, and then left: "No more playing!"
Qi Long on the other side of the table laughed out loud: "Hahahaha!"
Just as he was smiling, He Jiuhua hit Qi Long on the head with a hammer. With a duang sound, Qi Long's smile froze instantly.
"Have a drink!" He Jiuhua put down the air hammer and ran away.
Qi Long chased after them with an air hammer. After they exited the stage, the three of them returned to the stage, bowed and thanked the audience, which won warm applause from the audience.
This is also a traditional program that has been performed many times. The audience basically knows the jokes of crosstalk, and it all depends on the performance of the actors. Qi Long focused on teaching He Jiuhua how to react when being beaten backstage, and the effect was quite good, and the audience was very satisfied.
The words in the beginning were hilarious, and although the latter part was an old piece, it was the first time for most of the audience to see Jiuxi and Jiuhua perform drinking games. They enjoyed the performance because it was fresh and the completion was very high.
The thirty-five blows He Jiuhua received were not in vain.
Since Qi Long was there, the actors who had finished their performances before had not left the stage and were watching the show on the side. Qi Long simply invited them all out and introduced them one by one.
In the previous crosstalk competition, Qi Long and Dong Qiang stayed in Team 7 for a period of time, so he is familiar with these actors.
Those who were called upon would sing a little tune.
Qi Long also sang a cappella of Beijing Opera Drum, which he learned from Zhang Wanyi. Amid the satisfied applause of the audience, Qi Long's trip to the small theater officially ended.
When leaving the theater, Qi Long was stunned when he saw Qin Xiaoxian going to scan for shared bicycles: "Hey, where's your Maserati?"
Qin Xiaoxian said that he hasn't driven recently because the name of the program sounds very physically demanding, "Let's Run", so he wants to exercise, starting with riding a bicycle to and from get off work every day.
"That's good. You look too thin. You are tall and thin. You should exercise to build muscle. Go to your uncle Dongqiang's fitness channel and join in!" Before Qi Long finished speaking, Qin Xiaoxian's face darkened at a speed visible to the naked eye, and he looked aggrieved.
"Uncle, I'm too tired"
"Hahahaha, just kidding!" Qi Long waved his hands. He found it particularly interesting to tease Qin Xiaoxian.
From the time I temporarily collaborated with this junior fellow on the same stage and taught him how to be a supporting actor, I found this seemingly dull guy quite funny to tease.
After Qi Long and the girl group, other people joined one after another. As for the female guests, Dong Qiang was polite, but the male guests really worked very hard. Shao Bing's face turned pale after one episode.
So when Qin Xiaoxian heard that they were going, he was stunned.
Qi Long waved his hand, told him to see him on the show, and then got into his assistant's car.
Qi Long's assistant Xiao Chi was beside him: "Brother Long, look how scared he is that he can't even speak!"
"Let me tell you, I have 300,000 ways to amuse people, and I plan to use them all on Qin Xiaoxian in the show in the future, hahahaha!"
Xiao Chi smiled and said two words: "Look forward to it!"
I found that group crosstalk is always repetitive when writing. One person asks another, and then goes back to repeat the same sentence. As an author, I feel that it is too watery. So I simplified "Drinking Order" and wrote down the key crosstalk and funny content, and did not write the repetitive content.
(End of this chapter)
